A comical story from the 49ers' George Kittle about killing a spider prompted an unexpectedly tongue-in-cheek scolding from PETA, along with educational tips on relocating spiders outside instead.

San Francisco 49ers tight end George Kittle shared a funny anecdote  on social media Wednesday detailing how his wife woke him up at 4 am that morning after she encountered a giant spider “the size of a half dollar” in the bathroom.

He said he immediately jumped into action and smacked it with a board he uses for rehab — presumably for a recent Achilles tendon injury.

Well, as the California Post puts it, not everyone was having a laugh, as animal rights group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals lightheartedly expressed disappointment over Kittle’s inhumane treatment of the spider, accusing him of “unsportsmanlike conduct.” PETA instead encouraged the star player to adopt a “live and let live” approach with spiders.

PETA senior vice president Lisa Lange explained in a statement to the Post that the agency would be happy to send Kittle a bug-catcher to help him gently transfer any unwelcome spiders to the great outdoors instead of squashing them with his physical therapy equipment.

PETA also directed Kittle and others to its website for helpful tips on humanely dealing with unwanted insects in the home. Funnily enough, spiders are the best way to get rid of other insects, as one spider can reportedly consume around 2,000 insects per year.

Related: Adam Devine Leads 'Pitch Perfect'-Inspired Performance at Ferry Building With 49er George Kittle

Image: George Kittle #85 of the San Francisco 49ers warms up prior to a game against the Seattle Seahawks at Levi's Stadium on January 03, 2026 in Santa Clara, California. (Photo by Lachlan Cunningham/Getty Images)

A crested macaque monkey who lives in a rainforest on the Indonesian island of Sulawesi can not legally own the copyright to his own selfie, even if he pressed the button to take the photo himself. That is the tentative opinion of a federal judge in San Francisco, where the case was brought by People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), following a battle waged between a photographer and Wikipedia. As ABC 7 reports, PETA filed suit in the case last year, arguing that not only should the monkey own the copyright, but that proceeds from the photos ought to go toward protecting the monkey's habitat.

British nature photographer David Slater originally facilitated the photographs of Naruto, the six-year-old monkey, on a trip to Indonesia in 2011. He and the company for which he shot the photos, Wildlife Personalities Ltd, subsequently had to sue Wikimedia Commons in 2014, claiming that he's lost money since the photo was posted to Wikipedia — which assumed the photo was ineligible for copyright — and the site has still refused to remove the photo.

As the Guardian reports, the US Copyright Office subsequently updated its own policies in 2015 to clarify that copyrights can only be registered for works produced by human beings. So, yes, these elephant paintings can't be owned by the elephants who painted them.

U.S. District Judge William Orrick wrote in his tentative opinion Wednesday that there is "no indication" that the US Copyright Act should extend to animals. As Ars Technica reports, Orrick said from the bench, "I'm not the person to weigh into this. This is an issue for Congress and the president. If they think animals should have the right of copyright they're free, I think, under the Constitution, to do that."

Meanwhile, the internet has already decided that this case is dumb, and Slater's attorney, who's asking Orrick to dismiss the case, said, "I slapped my forehead like everybody else did," when he heard about the lawsuit.

PETA, nevertheless, is a master at publicity — they also made headlines this week delivering vegan jerky to the Oregon militiamen. And their attorney, Jeff Kerr, who says he's representing Naruto the monkey, still contends, "Naruto created [the photos], and he should be entitled to the copyright in those photos just like any other photographer."

PETA's official statement today said, in part, "We will continue to fight for Naruto and his community, who are in grave danger of being killed for bush meat or for foraging for food in a nearby village while their habitat disappears because of human encroachment. This case is a vital step toward fundamental rights for nonhuman animals for their own sake, not in relation to how they can be exploited by humans."

The judge is expected to leave the door open for PETA to amend its complaint.

Meanwhile, outside the court, Wednesday, ABC 7's Jonathan Bloom made a funny:

In their latest publicity stunt, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals have bitten down on the meaty story du jour to promote fake meat products as an acceptable substitute for real buffalo wings at your upcoming Super Bowl party. Next to blurry and angry-looking photo of Notre Dame star linebacker Manti Te'o, billboard reads, "Sometimes faking it is better."

Te'o, we're sure you've heard by now, rode a wave of fame and good will all the way to the BCS Championship game using a fabricated story about a fake dead girlfriend. PETA, as they do, is just picking over the bones of Te'o's story for some buzz marketing. Their point with the association? Vegan wings can be just as delicious as their dead poultry counterparts — a stance that is only slightly less delusional than Te'o himself.

PETA Spokesveggie and meatless offensive coordinator defends the organization's position in a press release:

"PETA thinks it's great to fake it—especially when it means saving chickens from abuses that would be illegal if the victims were cats or dogs," says PETA Vegetarian Campaign Specialist (and NFL fan) Ashley Byrne. "We're asking fans to tackle cruelty by digging into a hearty vegan meal for the big game—and beyond."

Although the billboard has yet to appear anywhere other than on Internet websites writing about it, PETA says they're currently negotiating advertising space for the image around New Orleans. (Meaning: it definitely won't be up before the Super Bowl, if at all.) The organization also pointed out that the Superdome serves a pretty good veggie gyro. Suddenly, we're longing for the days of those wholesome Campbell's Chunky Soup commercials.

PETA, readers may remember, once tried to rename San Francisco's troubled Tenderloin district after a meat substitute. They also dropped AT&T Park from their list of Veggie-friendly ballparks last summer, so they may have cooked up got some other beef with San Franciscojust on principal. Still, if you need to figure out how to make some Buffa-faux wings for your meat-averse Super Bowl party attendees, there are recipes.

Perhaps reflecting on how badly Tim Lincecum has been getting slaughtered on the mound, everyone's favorite stunt advocacy group has eliminated San Francisco's AT&T Park from their annual list of Top Ten Most Vegetarian-Friendly Ballparks. Oakland's freshly renamed O.Co Coliseum, meanwhile, managed to climb the ladder from #6 to #4 this year, because no animal has ever had to suffer in the East Bay.

Topping out the 2012 list is the Phillies' Citizen's Bank Park, which we know for a fact goes through more cheesesteaks in a week than PETA could ever be comfortable wrapping their alfalfa-addled brains around. And anyhow, they've got an in with Chase Utley.

Adding insult to the veggie-snub, it was just a year ago when PETA put aside their riduclous "Tempeh District" scheme to name AT&T Park the best ballpark in the country for those who shun dining on animal flesh. Those vegans sure are moody. Maybe someone ought to check their diets?

Previously: Animal Rights Activists Name AT&T Park Most Vegetarian-Friendly Ballpark
[PETA]

When the state's foie gras ban goes into effect in July of 2012, California restaurants will have to pull the luxurious (yet allegedly cruel) item from their menus. Although producers claim it doesn't hurt the birds -- producers who make anywhere up to $15 million a year for the savory treat -- foie gras is made by force feeding ducks and geese to fatten their liver. When the ban goes into effect, the item will most likely turn into an underground treat for the artisan set. A few notable California chefs revealed to Bloomberg their thoughts on the controversy, with some wiling to defy the state ban.

• Gary Danko, who plans to obey the law, explained, “I sell probably 40 orders a night or more...When the protesters are here, double that.”
• "When the ban comes in, we’re going to serve it every day," said Laurent Quenioux, a chef at Starry Kitchen in Los Angeles, "They can send me the foie gras police."
• Thomas Keller, chef at the French Laundry (three Michelin stars) in Yountville, and Per Se (another three Michelin stars) in New York City, said in an email: “Foie gras is a product that we have enjoyed preparing for our guests through the years and has been a regularly featured item on our menu...But we will certainly comply with the new foie gras ban law once it goes into effect."
• “The feedback from my guests and diners is it’s something that they really wanted,” James Beard Award-winner Traci Des Jardins revealed. “Foie gras is an attractive luxury food that people, when they are going to a fine-dining restaurant, want the opportunity to eat."
• “I think we need to get together and fight it,” demanded Roland Passot, owner and chef at Michelin-rated La Folie. “We eat meat. We raise those ducks to be eaten. We don’t raise them to become pets.”

As far as local production goes, business will be as usual since it's "a product that is in full compliance with...federal regulators.” With regard to the fattening method used, it's a difficult one. Wikipedia notes:

The feed is administered using a funnel fitted with a long tube (20-30 cm long), which forces the feed into the animal's esophagus; if an auger is used, the feeding takes about 45 to 60 seconds. Modern systems usually use a tube fed by a pneumatic pump; with such a system the operation time per duck takes about 2 to 3 seconds. During feeding, efforts are made to avoid damaging the bird's esophagus, which could cause injury or death, although researchers have found evidence of inflammation of the walls of the proventriculus after the first session of force-feeding. There is also indication of inflammation of the esophagus in the later stages of fattening.

For what it's worth, alternate productions of making foie gras have been used in recent years. This involves "timing the slaughter to coincide with the winter migration, when livers are naturally fattened."

Known for controversial and shocking methods of getting their word across, PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) plans on erecting a billboard in Sacramento featuring the image of a person about to put a pork chop into the microwave next to a picture of a loving mother pig and reads, "Everybody's Somebody's Baby. Go Vegan." WIth an obvious nod to a particularly gruesome story, PETA came up with the tasteless plan after a Sacramento woman was arrested this week for allegedly microwaving her 6-week-old baby to death.

"We're horrified at the thought of microwaving a helpless baby and hope that this billboard will open hearts and minds to the grief of other mothers who have their babies torn away from them simply to satisfy humans' fleeting taste sensations," crocodile tears PETA founder Ingrid E. Newkirk. "All infants, not just our own, deserve protection, and pigs, like cows and other animals, mourn the loss of their young when they are taken away to be eaten."

Ka Yang, 29, of Sacramento was arrested on Tuesday, accused of killing her 6-week-old daughter by putting her in the microwave. Yang was booked at the Sacramento County Main Jail. She is being held without bail.

The one piece that's been missing from this Tenderloin/Tempeh story (first reported by SFist) was an actual response from just-for-now Mayor Mustache himself. The Examiner, ever-vigilant in their pursuit of a story, finally got a comment out of Mayor Lee and, duh, he had to go and make it all about Twitter mid-Market rehab:

“I think most people are wanting to change not so much the name. They actually want to change lives, and that’s why you’re going to hear from me next week when I think we will have a positive road on the mid-Market legislation that incorporates the Tenderloin," Lee said. "I want to get ourselves into focus on the transformation of lives, the transformation of the storefronts and the businesses along mid-Market.”

The temporary mayor then went on to talk about how he'd like to take a stroll through the neighborhood with reps from Twitter and other tech companies to show them just how gross it really is.

[SFExaminer]

With everyone in town already weighing in on Twitter's tax break, the attention-grabby folks at PETA have figured out a way to insert themselves in to the conversation: by calling for an end to the loosely meat-related name of the city's most notorious neighborhood. Their alternative would be to call it by their safer, vegan name: the "Tempeh District", but they're open to other meatless suggestions. After the jump, PETA's open letter to Temporary Mayor Ed Lee (and forwarded on to us) reprinted in it's entirety.

March 29, 2011

The Honorable Edwin M. Lee
Mayor of San Francisco

Via e-mail

Dear Mayor Lee,

I am writing on behalf of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) and our more than 2 million members and supporters, including thousands in the Bay Area, with an idea that could help revitalize the struggling Tenderloin district: rename it the "Tempeh District." By discarding an outdated moniker that evokes the horrors of the meat trade, you'll be sending a strong message to progressive businesses and health-conscious residents that this neighborhood is ready for a fresh start.

Tempeh, a protein-packed food made from soybeans, is a healthy, cruelty-free meat substitute. In contrast, tenderloin comes from real suffering. In today's intensive meat production industry, piglets have their tails and testicles cut off without being given any painkillers and breeding sows are confined for life to metal crates so small they can't even turn around or take two steps. Cattle are burned with hot irons, their horns are cut or burned off, and males are castrated—all without painkillers.

It's true that the Tenderloin echoes vice and corruption and that slaughterhouses are constantly found to be in violation of the law and more. But now's the perfect time to put the city's past in the deep freeze. San Francisco is now renowned for some of the best vegan cuisine in the world, and the city deserves a neighborhood named after a delicious cruelty-free food instead of the flesh of an abused animal. If Tempeh doesn't excite you, how about Granola Flats or Seitan's Lair? You could even run a contest to choose a veggie moniker.

Sincerely yours,

Tracy Reiman
Executive Vice President

Tenderloin Supervisor Jane Kim's office did not immediately return requests for comment.

San Francisco ranks no. 7 when it comes to living a vegetarian lifestyle. According to the fruits and nuts at Peta, we're pretty neat.

The City by the Bay has opened its Golden Gate to a wide variety of vegan and vegan-friendly restaurants and cafés. While celebrated spots such as Millenium and Greens are well worth a visit, don't miss out on the "Neatloaf" at Ananda Fuara, the Broccoli Beef & Black Mushroom entrée at Golden Era, or the grilled portobello mushroom over creamy polenta, sautéed spinach, and crostini at the all-vegan Herbivore.

Bizarre cult-ish aesthetics notwithstanding, the Tenderloin-based Golden Era is an institution of tastiness that deserves your growling stomach's attention. Anyway, the top ten vegetarian cities are:

"Happy Holidays from 'Hobo'" by Travis Jensen.

Wow. OK. At an appearance onstage at South San Francisco Day in Orange Memorial Park on Saturday, a PETA member got up on stage and smacked a guy dressed as Ronald McDonald in the face with a vegan custard pie.

PETA tells SFist:

The protest is part of PETA's campaign to convince McDonald's to switch to an improved slaughter method that would eliminate the worst abuses of chickens, including having their legs slammed into shackles, often breaking them, and being scalded to death.

This brings to mind a bone-shatteringly brilliant story care of Vogue editor Anna Wintour. In an effort to get back at People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, "[Wintour] and Vogue publisher Ron Galotti once retaliated for a [PETA] protest outside the Condé Nast offices during the company's annual Christmas party by sending down a plate of roast beef." Really, this woman can do no wrong. We digress.

Check out more images from today's McNugget protest at PETA.org. Another shot from Saturday's creamy protest waits for you after the jump.

Why, here's a shot from this afternoon's PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) protest against McDonald's, over on the 600 block of Van Ness. Not nearly as erotic as we had anticipated, but effective. Yes? No?

Eater has more.

Also, yes, please, McDonald's, stop scaling chickens. Ouch.

Want to see slinky, kinda nude women bathing in a tank of blood-colored water on Van Ness at noon? Of course you do. According to , PETA campaigner Jena Hunt "organized a protest scheduled for noon today at 600 Van Ness Ave., where two PETA 'chicks' in red bikinis will be crammed together in a tank of 'bloody' water with the message 'McDonald’s Scalds Chicks; to Death.'" (Aside: While we do not care much for McDonald's culinary vision, we highly recommend their Crispy ranch BLT sandwich, which you can get grilled or fried. Well worth the 600 calories. Trust us.) In an interview with the Ex, Hunt explains, there "a more humane slaughter method called controlled-atmosphere killing ensures that animals are killed painlessly while still in their transport crates before they have their throats cut or are handled by workers." Good point, Hunt. Also, there's a "McCruelty: I’m Hatin' It" billboard up at Sixth and Brannan today.

On one hand, we hate the idea or horses being used as engines to carry tourists around city streets; on the other hand, these bitches are batshit. See, it seems Peta (AKA: the National Organization of Helping Pamela Anderson's Breasts Put a Stop to KFC's Savoriness) sent an "urgent letter" to San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom and the Board of Supes, asking them them to ban horse-drawn carriages throughout San Francisco. This comes on the heels of a spooked carriage horse running amok this past weekend, injuring several passersby. According to PETA director Debbie Leahy, "Forcing horses to pull heavy loads through busy city streets is cruel, and it's an accident waiting to happen ... This incident should be a wake-up call for the city, and we urge officials to ban these rides before the next accident occurs." UPDATE: SFist asked Newsom's office what they thought of PETA's request. Newsom spokesperson Nathan Ballard (brilliantly) told us, "Next they’ll be asking us to ban cobblestones, monocles, hoop skirts, top hats and gas lamps!" (Well said, Nathan.)