Conservatives are doing what they do best-- feigning outrage over trivial little thing, that being the fact that Gavin issued a proclamation making last Friday, "Colt Studio Day." For those not in the know, Colt Studio is a gay porn company in San Francisco that just recently celebrated it's 40th Anniversary. ...

Yep, it's holiday time and that makes it a great time to go to the movies. After all, by Friday the family has pretty much run out of things to talk about so seeing movies is a way for the family to do stuff together without ever talking. So what's opening this week?...

Let's see, here's a list of things in San Francisco you can't do: -Smoke (tobacco, that is). -Put left-over food in a Styrofoam container -Go shopping with plastic bags -Stop somebody from taking a dump on the street And now we can add another thing to the list-- no more "private dancing" in private booths at strip clubs. All of this thanks to the Commission on the Status of Women who went and gone did it and passed a bill banning private booths. The decision is now up to the Board of Supervisors who have the final say on this as we guess the Commission on the Status of Drunk, Horny Frat Boys were too hungover to weigh in on the subject. And if there's anything out there that deserves to be put on a ballot and voted on we say it's this. We mean, wouldn't the campaign commercials (usually probably airing at like 1 in the morning) be awesome? "Biff's buddies wanted to get him a special lap dance for his bachelor party, but thanks to a bunch of freedom-loving Feminazis, he was unable to. Because of them, he had to have his bachelor party at Chuck E. Cheese...." ...

Wednesday night, a San Francisco commission is all set to take up one of the pre-eminent issues facing our fair city-- private booths in strip clubs. For those who have never frequented a strip club (we, of course, find strip clubs exploitive of women and those photos that circulated around the internet of SFist at the strip club are totally false and it wasn't our idea and we didn't pay for it!!!!), private booths are places where you can go and get a "special" kind of lap dance for extra money, all depending on the amount of money. Hey, sometimes you need a little privacy. The issue is whether to allow them or not. ...

In Sunday's Chron, Ray Ratto had a pretty funny little piece about all the obstacles the 49ers, and A's, face in getting a new stadium built. In it, Ratto turned the challenge into a board game you can play at home. Land on the "Board of Supervisors," for instance and you're told that you will "lose five hours of your life while they argue about what kind of plants to put in the stadium foyer and which gardening service should water them." But while Ratto mentioned all the usual problems, he never mentioned the difficulties the Niners might face when an extremely politically incorrect training video that makes fun of the Mayor mysteriously shows up in Matier & Ross' in-box. Also in the video are lesbian scenes. Not to mention ethnic jokes, gay marriage jokes, gay prison sex jokes, lots of nudity, and all sorts of other goodies. Aye carumba! ...

With Dr. Hunter S. Thompson moving on to bigger and better things, writers, critics, stoners and other hangers-on are organizing tributes around the country and around the world. But we have a feeling that the only one Hunter himself would have attended would be right here in San Francisco at the Edinburgh Castle Pub. Sure, Jahn Wenner will probably throw some blockbuster event full of literary luminaries in New York, but we all know......