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49ers at Falcons NFC Championship Game Preview

Brock Keeling — Fri, 18 Jan 2013 12:50:22 GMT

By Daisy Barringer

Note: I have knocked on wood for every single positive thing stated in this article. This, despite the fact that I learned this morning the reason we knock on wood is because if we don’t, little mischievous gremlins will come out of the wood to ensure that the opposite of whatever we say comes true. Which is, like, the dumbest thing EVER. Nonetheless Knocking. A lot.

So this is it. One more game until the Super Bowl. One win away from a shot at it all. As of noon on Sunday, it will only be sixty minutes of play (three hours) until we’ll know if the 49ers are going to New Orleans or going home to lock themselves in their crying closets, a place I just invented, but that should totally exist because, ugh, watching people cry is the grossest. (Note: I will absolutely be crying on Sunday. Win/Loss/Whatever. There will be tears and there will probably be a lot of them.)

Seriously people? I AM FREAKING THE [F-WORD HERE] OUT. And I know I owe you some sort of intelligent article about how we’re going to do this, but I’m too nervous to even think straight. WE ARE IN THE NFC CHAMPIONSHIP GAME. And even better? WE CAN WIN THIS. Sorry for the all caps, but I'm overstimulated

Speaking of, there’s a hot guy delivering firewood to my cabin right now. It’s a little distracting.

OK. NINERS. FALCONS. How’s this gonna go down? Let’s discuss.

The Good

Um, did you SEE Colin Kaepernick last week? Yeah. That’s not just good, it’s stupendous. He can pass. He can run. And he cannot be stopped. Even better, the Falcons have struggled against mobile QBs all year. So, I expect to watch them suck it.
The running game. Frank Gore, LaMichael James, and, oh right: Kaepernick. Atlanta will have to shut it down to have a shot and I just don’t see that happening.
Atlanta, however, is not going to be able to run the ball on us, which means that their hopes are all on QB Matt Ryan’s shoulders. Guess who loves to throw interceptions in playoff games? Matt Ryan. If he throws two picks, it’s game over. If Atlanta wants a shot at this, Matt Ryan is going to have to be mistake free. He can’t give our defense a chance to put our offense back on the field.
Our defense. Just, you know, in general. They always say that defense wins games, but the amazing thing about our defense now is that we ALSO have an offense. It’s not solely up to them to win this thing. But I know they’ll come out fast and furious and thank god Justin Smith is back. His presence on the field truly makes such a difference.
Crabtree, Moss, Vernon Davis (if Kap can get him the ball) and the rest of our tight ends and receivers. Kap can float the ball or he can jam it up the middle hard. Which sounds sexual, but isn’t.
Atlanta’s running back: Michael Turner. Sure the dude had a good game last week, but he played crappy all season and I don’t expect him to do much, if anything, against our D. If Atlanta can’t establish a run, they’re going to have a hard time winning.
David Akers. Hahahaha. Kidding! Just making sure you’re paying attention.

The Bad

The Falcons have home-field advantage and they play in a dome, which can obviously get loud. Luckily, their fans aren’t the best. I think it’ll get loud, but not like Seattle loud.
The Falcons are good. Obviously. They finished 13-3 this season. Everyone kept saying they were over-rated, but they managed to get to this point, so they were clearly doing something right. The Niners just need to keep that in mind and play hard though and we’ll be fine.
Roddy White, Julio Jones, and Tony Gonzalez. First of all, why is Julio the most fun name in all of the land to say? But besides that, when Matt Ryan finds these guys down the field, they’re explosive. Fact.
Vernon Davis just hasn’t been getting the ball lately. He and Kap don’t have “chemistry” yet, but we don’t really have time for them to find that chemistry. I mean, I don’t know if they’re waiting for a romantic candlelit dinner, but it’s not gonna happen. They just need to do it and get it over with and get the ball in VD’s hands.
Atlanta’s defense. I haven’t had a chance to watch many Falcons games this year, so I’m curious to see how they perform. Word on the street is they’re good. I guess we’ll just have to see how good.
WWL. WWL. WWT(L). WWL. WWL. WW ???? THE PATTERN MUST STOP HERE.

The Rest of It

Obviously this game is huge. There’s no other way to say it. I’m already debating if I’ll go to New Orleans or not. That’s how much faith I have that the Niners can beat this Atlanta Falcons team. But, on any given Sunday...

The Niners will need to come out and play the way we know they can. They can’t make mistakes. Special teams needs to be spot-on. Kaepernick needs to be smart and, if he makes a mistake, recover in the same way he did after his INT in the Green Bay game. And our defense needs to play the way they always do and force Atlanta to turn the ball over. If we can do that, we’ve got this. I really think we’ve got this.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, I finally got up enough nerve to flirt with the firewood guy and then my friend’s dog took a huge shit in front of him, effectively ruining my game. No guy wants to sit around and chat with a girl who’s picking up poop. Fact.

But who has time for sex when the Niners have this huge game in two days? (I do, world. I do.)

Watch San Francisco at Atlanta on Sunday at 12 p.m. PT on FOX.

Former NBC Bay Area Sports Anchor Daryl Hawks Found Dead

Brock Keeling — Thu, 12 May 2011 13:28:03 GMT

Three-time Emmy winner Daryl Hawks, a former NBC Bay Area Sports anchorperson, was found dead inside an Atlanta hotel room Thursday morning. Rich Lieberman reports: "Atlanta police called Hawks' death a medical emergency and not a police call. His body was discovered after he did not appear for the Bulls' morning shoot around. Paramedics were called and he was taken to a local hospital at about 10:30 a.m., according to Atlanta police Sgt. Curtis Davenport."

The cause of his death is not yet known.

According to NBC Bay Area, Hawks last worked at NBC Chicago. He died at 38.

Atlanta Braves Coach Accused of Making Gay Slurs at AT&T Park

Brock Keeling — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 16:45:19 GMT

Uh oh. A pitching coach for the Atlanta Braves is in hot sweet tea for making anti-gay remarks AT&T Park last weekend. TMZ reports: "Atlanta Braves pitching coach Roger McDowell has been accused of targeting a group of male fans last weekend at a Giants game in San Fran -- allegedly asking them, 'Are you a homo couple or a threesome?' " The announcement was made today by--who else?--the world's favorite buttinski, Gloria Allred.

According to Allred, a family at last week's game claims that they witnessed McDowell tell a group of male fans, "Are you three giving it to each other in the ass?"

The father of the family, who confronted McDowell upon hearing the disturbing remarks, says that the mean-spirited coach then told him "Kids don't fucking belong at the baseball park" ... and then approached him with a baseball bat, saying, "How much are your teeth worth?"

Charming. "This is the kind of thing that could and maybe should get McDowell fired," said NBC Sports' Craig Calcaterra.

For what it's worth, Roger McDowell admitted and apologized for this actions. He released a statement this afternoon, saying, “I am deeply sorry that I responded to the heckling fans in San Francisco on Saturday. I apologize to everyone for my actions."

[Hardball Talk]

After Beating Braves, Giants Move to NLCS

Brock Keeling — Mon, 11 Oct 2010 21:07:54 GMT

In the second straight 3-2 victory against Atlanta -- the Giants don't seem to believe in insurance, do they? -- San Francisco won their Division Series three games to one tonight. And, just like they did eight years ago, they celebrated by drenching each other in sparkling wine.

After the ninth inning came to a close, fireworks could be heard in the Mission and Daly City. Even Turner Broadcasting System's one-sided broadcast of the series couldn't hold San Francisco, or its fans, down.

On Saturday, the Giants face the Phillies in Game 1of the National League Championship Series in Philadelphia. Tim Lincecum and Roy Halladay will battle it out "in what would be the most anticipated matchup of this postseason."

Brace yourselves.

[Chronicle]

Unfettered Journalism, Homonyms, Print Mixing

Brock Keeling — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 12:22:59 GMT

Yesterday, David Hazinski attempted to harness the awesome power of the world wide web with this colonel of wisdom about the currant state of journalism. In his op-ed peace for The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, he informs us that such journalistic mediums as CNN YouTube debates, political blogs, and cellphone videos are, in a word, crap. At least when it comes to giving and receiving accurate, Pulitzer-worthy information.

Granite, the only time we here at SFist concern ourselves with accuracy is if it involves us getting something for free, butt old man Hazinski has a point: "unfettered citizen journalism" really needs standards. Makes scents, right? Standards that, presumably, can only be created, administered, and understood within the holy temple of j-school. But if he's sew intent on maintaining the time-honored tradition of elbow patch-adorned sports jackets, hiding flask of whiskey in desk drawers, and spewing phrases like "excellence in journalism" or "hot scoop!" then why the does his article mimic any TLDR posting you might find on l'Internet? The exact shit he's freaking out about?

Take, for example, how Hazinski -- the head of broadcast gnus at the University of Georgia -- misspells "principles." Twice.

...Citizen reports can be a valuable addition to news and information flow with some protections. ...There are commonly accepted ethical principals — two source confirmation of controversial information or the balanced reporting of both sides of a story, for example, but adhering to the principals is voluntary...

American Football Spectacular: At The Bottom And Still Falling

SFist Christopher Rogers — Sat, 03 Nov 2007 16:57:51 GMT

"Do you remember bein' promising?" -- Trouble by Engine 88.

Continuing the tour of pain through the ex-members of the NFC West, this week the 49ers visit the the wreckage that once was the Atlanta Falcons.

* San Francisco vs. Atlanta
Sunday, November 4, 2007. 1:00 PM, PST.
Week 09
The Battle At The Bottom Of The Barrel

This game can be one of two things to the Niners in past-tense: it can either be the turning point where the team righted itself and put smidge of fear back into the NFC West title race, or it'll just be part of the conversation come the 2008 NFL Draft as SF picks within the top 5.

Photo via the Chron.

If you didn't watch last week's game against the Saints, be glad. Oh, horrors. The offense simply could not function, and the defense's faults were exploited. The 49er team was gently torn-in-two on both sides of the ball, like the Saints were pulling apart a soft oven-warmed sourdough roll.

No improvement since the previous week's 15-33 bastinado at the hands of the New York American football Giants. Nothin'. The problem continues to be the offensive play-calling, since there's been nothing but upgrades to the players on that side of the ball over last season's squad. The play-call is Offensive Coordinator Jim Hostler's responsibility. And, much like our current presidential regime and US foreign policy -- this important responsibility should be given to someone who can actually do the job. We haven't seen such a stubborn, fool-headed way of running an offense since, well... last season's Raiders.

This must end. The offensive unit is bringing down this entire franchise on-the-field. The best that can be said for all this adversity is that the team has held morale and stuck together better than could be expected in the face of blown expectations. And punter Andy Lee is distinguishing himself as being one of the league's best. O'course, he's getting plenty of practice.

Where Was This Dude in '93?

Jon — Fri, 26 Oct 2007 16:18:26 GMT

It appears to be bomb day here at the ole 'Fist as we have yet another bomb story to relate to y'all. This one involves a die-hard (seriously die-hard) Giants fan who called in bomb threats at Turner Field in Atlanta.

The fan, Dante Suguitan, pleaded guilty to calling in the threats during the 2005 season in an attempt to somehow intimidate Braves players who, in turn, would lose to the Giants. He actually called in twice, one on August 10th and the other on August 11th, both dates in which the Giants played the Braves. One of the threats said that the bomb was atomic and "looked like a Coke can." The other was supposed to go off during the tomahawk-chop thing that the Braves fans do, kinda like how Jimbo rigged that bomb to go off when John Stamos' brother hit that high note on "Loving You" on "South Park."

Suguitan apparently also believed that Giants broadcasters were talking to him and that he could "manipulate the outcome of games by listening to them on the radio or watching them on television." It’s true too-- if you listen to Kruik & Kuip backwards, they say "turn me on, Giants fans."

Since today is Friday and we couldn't come up with some sort of image for this, we just thought we'd post a video of the Gap Band doing "Your Dropped a Bomb on Me." Enjoy it's awesomisity.

Muni Loves To Count

SFist_Dan — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 09:54:08 GMT

There's a money room in the basement of 1 South Van Ness, where the Municipal Transportation Agency, which operates Muni, is headquartered. Workers literally count by hand bags of cash and coins taken in as fares from passengers throughout the day.

After we finished bashing our heads against the windows and swearing, we read on:

When Muni recently needed to pull some of those unionized bean counters away from the money room to staff kiosks around the city where transit passes are sold, its managers hoped to replace them with workers from a private contracting outfit.

Surely someone, somewhere has come up with a better way to count large amounts of change and small bills, haven't they? Nah. If someone had invented something that space-age and wonderful, Muni would have purchased it long ago, freeing up those employees to man those empty kiosks and obviating the need for contractors! Everybody would win! Sadly, that technology is only the stuff of dreams.

Losing the Fuzz Via Gender Reassignment: John Mark Karr

Brock Keeling — Thu, 30 Aug 2007 14:10:27 GMT

God bless the Bay Area Reporter.

In this week's issue, Ed Walsh reports that former JonBenet Ramsey murder suspect and one-time possible kiddie porn connoisseur, John Mark Karr, "had sought gender reassignment surgery, not because of any driving desire to become a woman, but to help him avoid capture by police."

That seems a bit drastic if you're not actually a woman inside, yes? Fascinating, but drastic.

In lieu of Anne Frank-esque hiding or simply coloring his hair and adopting a British accent, Karr was in the process of hormone treatment and laser hair removal before getting arrested and shipped back to Colorado. Now engaged to a dame and living in Atlanta, he went on to tell Walsh that he "saw it as an opportunity to change my identity and further evade law enforcement."

Seriously, we can't do the article the justice it deserves, so check it out for yourselves here.

We're Number One! San Francisco Is Top City For Singles

SFist Jer — Wed, 22 Aug 2007 10:35:42 GMT

Hey, all you singles in San Francisco/Oakland, looks like you live in the right place. Our fair city was tops in Forbes 7th Annual Best Cities for Singles Report.

The magazine made this determination using the following criteria: coolness, cost of living alone, culture, job growth, online dating (?), nightlife, number of singles. While we're not upset at this victory, we'd quibble with the notion that online dating, specifically "the number of active profiles in each city listed on dating site Yahoo! Personals", should factor in.

In the past, Forbes defined a city by its "Metropolitan Statistical Area"; now the magazine is defining a city by its narrower "Urbanized Area." Online dating helps to transcend geography -- the study using online dating as a factor flies in the face of this more-focused methodology.

Even with this contention, we'll say, as we often do: everybody loves a list. And everybody loves being pronounced "best." But will everybody love that they decided Mayor Newsom is "Most Eligible Bachelor?" Doubt it. How about "Most Eligible Bachelorette" Marissa Mayer -- a Veep at Goooooogle?

Here's Forbes' Top 10: 1. San Francisco-Oakland, Calif.; 2. New York City, N.Y.; 3. Los Angeles, Calif.; 4. Atlanta, Ga.; 5. Chicago, Ill.; 6. Washington, D.C.; 7. San Diego, Calif.; 8. Seattle, Wash.; 9. Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas; 10. Philadelphia, Pa.

For the extended list, methodology, and bonus articles (including one by the Bay Area's own Violet Blue) check out the extended article.

One more note: in an AP photo on the SF/Oakland feature, unless we're mistaken, there's a young lady that appears to be walking on Cupid's Span. NAUGHTY! NAUGHTY!

SFist Tonight

Brock Keeling — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 12:23:51 GMT

-- Tegan & Sara: identical twins cum awesome rock songstresses with questionable haircuts play tonight in the Mission. Show starts at 8 p.m., Brava Theater, 2789 24th St.; tickets are $25.

-- Arj Barker & Friends: Local comedian and co-writer of the Marijuana-Logues, plus a slew of special guests, perform tonight. 8 p.m. at the Punchline, 444 Battery; admission is a mere $10.

-- Chromeo: Oh-so zany electrofunk duo break your illusions of nothing-to-do Monday nights with this special set. Guest DJs Flosstradamus, Codebreaker, Jefrodisiac, Ritchie Panic, and Chromeo go on at 9 p.m. at Mezzanine, 444 Jesse (at Sixth St.); admission is free, visit here for more info.

-- SF Giants vs. Atlanta Braves: Watch locals wring their hands over Barry Bonds approaching the record(s), Braves fans doing the tomahawk chop. Game starts at 7:15 p.m., AT&T Park, Third and King Streets; tickets go for $10-$90, and then some.

Image of Sara Quin courtesy of Rolling Stone

American Football Spectacular: Capsulizing the 2007 NFL Draft's First Round

SFist Christopher Rogers — Wed, 02 May 2007 10:37:24 GMT

It's time for American Football Spectacular's capsule reviews of the 2007 NFL Draft. Adventure, excitement,! All hard information was culled from NFL.com's pretty excellent draft tracker site. Proceed.

* Selection # / Team (trade info) / Player / Position / Height / Weight / School

* 01 / Oakland / Russell, JaMarcus / QB / 6-6 / 263 / Louisiana State: Sorry, JaMarcus; the Raiders only picked up one offensive lineman in the draft. So, uh, now you've got that guy and Jeremy Newberry to add to last year's offensive line unit. Start buying pain medication in bulk now, my friend, 'cause you will be sacked a lot this coming season. On the bright side for Oakland, have you seen how well the Golden State Warriors are doing?

* 02 / Detroit / Johnson, Calvin / WR / 6-4 / 237 / Georgia Tech: The founder of K Records and a key member of the Northwestern indie rock scene, it will be intriguing to see how well Johnson excels within Detroit offensive coordinator Mad Mike Martz's multi-receiver pass patterns. (Har, har.) Now seriously, either Calvin Johnson has the talent to be a success wherever they go, but Detroit's legacy of leadership futility makes it specifically difficult to succeed there. Fire Millen!

* 03 / Cleveland / Thomas, Joe / OT / 6-6 / 313 / Wisconsin: Went fishin' with his Dad for draft day rather than dealing with the New York City draft spectacle. Smart guy.

* 04 / Tampa Bay / Adams, Gaines / DE / 6-5 / 260 / Clemson: The Bucs coveted WR Calvin Johnson, but'll settle for a new defensive edge-rusher to succeed the aging pass-rushing DE Simeon Rice.

* 05 / Arizona / Brown, Levi / OT / 6-4 / 328 / Penn State: Must protect pretty QB Leinart. So, they got this guy.

* 06 / Washington / Landry, LaRon / FS / 6-2 / 205 / Louisiana State: Sure must suck to be a Washington fan. After wasting a bunch of money on free agent safety Adam Archuleta last season, Washington spends its first-rounder on another safety.

* 07 / Minnesota / Peterson, Adrian / RB / 6-2 / 218 / Oklahoma: A speedy power-back with a history of injuries, this guy is the new Priest Holmes. What that means is this caveat: sure he's great; but how long will he last?

* 08 / Atlanta (from Houston) / Anderson, Jamaal / DE / 6-6 / 279 / Arkansas: The Falcons have been trying to buy or draft a pass rush for the past couple years. Maybe this'll do'er.

* 09 / Miami / Ginn Jr., Ted / WR / 6-0 / 180 / Ohio State: Surprise! On her couch in Chicago, Jessica shouted at her television in disbelief. We don't blame her. The Dolphins needneedneedNEEED a quarterback above all else! Yet instead of picking up ND's uber-touted QB Brady Quinn, Miami picks up a speedster receiver coming off a debilitating leg injury. Who-the-wha-now? Hmph. Extremely high-risk, with poor odds of good results. This pick will determine how the the history of the 2007 NFL Draft is remembered.

* 12 / Buffalo / Lynch, Marshawn / RB / 5-11 / 217 / California: Cal's own Marshawn goes to Buffalo to replace Willis McGahee at running back, and appreciate the musical canon of Ani DiFranco.

* 13 / St. Louis / Carriker, Adam / DE / 6-6 / 292 / Nebraska: A big, meaty defensive end from Nebraska, Carriker's name is a lot more fun if you imagine Homestar Runner saying it out loud. Try!

Photo of Patrick Willis via sf49ers.com

All the rest from round one after the jump.

measureables

The Warriors: The Season's Biggest Game

chris — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 15:10:18 GMT

If you were born after 1994 you have no idea what it's like. If you're a long-time fan, you might have a hazy, vague recollection of it. If you come from places like Los Angeles, Chicago, or Miami, you desperately miss it. We're talking a big game -- more specifically, a Warriors big game. An important game. A game that means something besides wrapping up a Lottery pick or nudging out Seattle or Memphis for the 11th overall spot in the Western Conference.

Tonight the Warriors play the Indiana Pacers in their biggest, most important game of this season or possibly the last 10 seasons. If the Dubs win, their slight hopes for the last playoff spot in the WC remain on life support; if they lose, consider the plug pulled on yet another failed season.

Tonight is also the first game in which the Warriors will face former teammates Troy Murphy, Mike Dunleavy, Ike Diogu, and Keith McLeod, players jettisoned from the roster with extreme prejudice last month as part of an eight-player trade. This adds another delicious layer of significance to tonight's game because there is no love lost between the players involved and their former teams.

The Warriors are still afloat, but the season is sinking fast. A loss tonight and they'll have to add a spot for Davy Jones to the team's locker room. Photo from Hydrolance.net.

Why is tonight's game so important to the Warriors? Because if they win tonight, they will improve to 2-3 on the current road trip. As we pointed out last week, it is imperative that the Warriors at least break even on this road trip if they have any hopes of keeping their playoff dreams alive. After extremely disappointing tank jobs against Cleveland (even without LeBron) and Atlanta to start the trip, the Warriors squeaked out a W against the woeful 76'ers, but face-planted to yet another come-from-ahead loss against the Charlotte Bobcats on Friday night.

Who Loves the 90's? The Raiders Do!

Jon — Tue, 29 Aug 2006 07:48:58 GMT

Let's go to the rap sheet, shall we? At his first stop in Indianapolis he was let go after making obscene gestures at the coach during a game. At his next stop in Atlanta, he got benched for a season after only yelling at the coach during a game. After that there was a quick succession of teams who fell in love with his arm but quickly fell out of love with his attitude. And yes, that includes the Raiders before he ran afoul of Chucky Gruden and was let go. He also sported one of the worst mullets in sports.

Oh yeah, he also hasn't played in several years. Like since 2001. He was last signed to an NFL contract in 2004. According to the Chron, he was last seen running a "run-and-shoot offense for a fourth-grade football team in his hometown of Indianapolis." And he's 38 fer crissakes, which would make him a rookie on the Giants, but we digress

All of this shouldn't be that surprising consider the coach hasn't been a head coach in twelve years and the offensive coordinator hasn't worked in football in seven years. Seriously, shouldn't Al start investing in new technology? You know, like the kind that allows you to scout players and coaches using something other than VHS technology? A lot has changed since then, you know: a Bush is in the White House, we're in a war in the Middle East, and the economy sucks.

Huh. Anyyone know what Thurman Thomas is up to these days?

The Macho Adventures of the Superfisters

Matt Baume — Mon, 21 Aug 2006 12:11:37 GMT

It's the end of days, lakes are on fire, it's raining frogs, and zombies roam. Dirty toughguys Otis and Dale Savage make a living as bounty hunters -- folks pay them to track down the specific zombies that were their family members, and assure that their undead loved ones are put to a specific end. It's a good enough living, and they take their apocalyptic setting with teeth-gritted good humor. And then a mystery man in a suit comissions them to retrieve a zombie doctor from the dangerous zombie slum of Atlanta, and they proceed to get chased, shot at, and then stumble across a head in a jar who's about to sacrifice a virgin stripper. In other words, things get interesting.