*MUSIC: We've got two tastes for you tonight. First, aging rockers Queensrÿche perform at the Fillmore. They use an umlaut in their name, so you know they're hardcore. Too much? Then, how about award winning R&B songstress Veronica Klaus over at Enrico's? She's blusey and cabaret-y -- a stellar combo.

FILM: Richard Kelly's disastrous follow up to college campus favorite , Southland Tales -- a sprawling SoCal tale set over the course of three days ,ending in a massive 4th of July celebration -- screens tonight at the Red Vic. Read more about it here.

CLUB: Noise Pop kicks of the festivities with a some Mika Miko over at the Rickshaw Stop. Temponotempo also performs, and although it looks like a concert show, it's mainly a night infused and littered with local musicians and music writers, respectively. A big shmooz fest that's actually a lot of fun.

COFFEE KLATCH: Looking to chat with other black queer gents likeyourself? Head over to SF Brothas at Three Dollar Bill Cafe tonight. They meet every Tuesday.

The listed events were chosen by the editors of SFist and brought to you by the 2009 Toyota Corolla.

In the middle part of the 19th century, a thick set of whiskers were an essential facial feature of every man of Victorian respectability.

These were not simply expressions of pride or masculine peacock vanity, but due to a whole rainbow of reasons, ranging from the fact that Man had been created in God's image, to the "fact" that beards protected the wearer against tuberculosis, and even that shaving led to immorality, murder, and suicide!

In the late 1880s, however, a movement began to sweep towards San Francisco from the far-off shores of Europe.

No, it wasn't Bolshevism -- anyway, not yet. In the words of historian Oscar Lewis, "It was no less than a world-wide agitation in favor of whiskerless waiters" ("Whiskerless Waiters" -- we respectfully offer that up as a name for an indie-rock band. No charge!)

But back to Gilded Age San Francisco.

Just about every high-falutin' eating establishment in town followed the new, hygienic fashion; the Poodle Dog, Maison Riche, all began featuring clean-shaven waiters. All of them, that is, except for William Sharon's Palace Hotel. The Palace remained proudly pro-moustache, in way that vividly recalls the social instability brought on by the Gold Rush:

"In the leading European hotels a waiter cannot wear a moustache, and the swell establishements in New York are imitating this fashion, but it will not do here. There is this difference: in Europe a man once a servant is always a servant, but in America the servant of today may be a millionaire tomorrow."

"We wouldn't try to enforce such a rule at the Palace. We have trouble enough without trying to bring (that) on!"

FILM: In Being Michael Madsen, the titular star "turns the tables on notorious paparazzo, Billy Dant, by hiring a trio of documentary filmmakers to chronicle Dant's life, loves, and troubles." Crafty! The film also stars David Carradine, Daryl Hannah, and Virginia Madsen. Screens at The Roxie.

READING: Michael Layne Heath and William Taylor Jr. read in honor of Abraham Lincoln's birthday (and of being our first gay Republican president!) at Dog Eared Books.

* MUSIC: Put on your favorite black t-shit and whitest face powder. The queen has returned. Lead singer of Siouxsie & the Banshees and the Creatures, Siouxsie Sioux has influenced countless goth bands, punk outfits, girl groups, and trannies. Now, after a disastrous performance at the Warfield several years ago, she returns (this time to the Fillmore) for a two-night stay. Her "Mantaray & More Tour" opens with Rasputina.

CLUB: Before Trannyshack bids us adieu , check out the return of former Trannyshacker and current Scissor Sister Ana Matronic for "Ladies Choice" night. For those of you not in the know, the show starts a midnight at The Stud in SOMA.

The listed events were chosen by the editors of SFist and brought to you by the 2009 Toyota Corolla.

For what it's worth: "In celebration of National Pancake Day on Tuesday, February 12, 2008 from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m., IHOP, one of America's favorite restaurants for breakfast, lunch and dinner, will give away one free short stack of its signature buttermilk pancakes to all guests," according to iHOP.

But where in heaven's name are we to find an iHOP in gastronomically governed San Francisco? Well, there are two iHOPs in SF: one at 200 Beach Street (i.e., at the Wharf, a few blocks away from San Francisco's only In-N-Out) and the other at 2299 Lombard. Who knew? (Okay, didn't) For more locations, go here.

But if you can't swing by America's favorite pancake chain, why not pick up some aerosol pancake batter? Or how about these whimsical "Jewish pancakes" topped with gravlax, crème fraîche, and caviar? Mmm mm.

Well, this should be exciting, hateful. This Sunday at 11 a.m. at 701 Montgomery Street in San Francisco, there will be a protest over that religious sect those zany Hollywood types know and love so well. You know, the one where you can't take Prozac, or call you Jewish children, or....whatever. (For a map of the SF branch, go here.) It sounds like it will be a Sunday afternoon well-spent. Instruction are as follows:

- Wear EFG Mask if possible: Purchase them on Amazon -- And yes, they're legal in SF as long as you remove them at the request of the officer

- Bring a lightweight sign that is comfortable to hold... If you can, cover it in a clear plastic bag, or make it out of a waterproof material- there might be rain

- Accessories TO bring: Backpack, water, snacks, cellphone, video/still camera, change for public transit

- Accessories NOT to bring: Any form of ID, excessive cash, a car (public transit is cheaper and maintains anonymity)

Speaking of Oprah, the fellow Aquarian just received American sculptor Daniel Edwards' chin-scratching touch. (You know, the celeb-loving guy who created that Britney-gives-birth sculpture?) Anyway, Edwards says his "piece pays homage to the closest thing America has to a living deity," hence its resemblance to the coffin of Egypt's Tutankhamun (King Tut!)

Or maybe not. According to a thisislondon commenter:

She's in the guise of fertility goddesses. It's about celebrating her feminity [sic] and also Africanness by associating her with this kind of image. If you are going to poke fun at anything, make a big deal about the puritanical attitudes that insist that she's wearing what can only be described as a bikini top, which kind of negates the earth mother thing and looks completely stupid.

Huh? There's nothing puritanical about a bikini top. Those wacky Brits. Anyway, were enjoying this ever much. So shiny.

At around 11:30 a.m. today at Digital Pre-Press International (DPI), located at Mariposa and Minnesota, a woman died while on the clock. It seems she "became enmeshed in the massive piece of equipment" at the San Francisco-based printing press. SFFD Lt. Ken Smith told CBS 5 that although his crew was successful "extricating her from the machine," she failed to recover from injuries sustained in the accident. As of now it is unclear as to what exact job the unidentified woman was performing just prior to her death.

This comes after yesterday's on-site fatality at an abandoned PG&E plant, where voluminous falling debris took the life of Luis Gonzalez, 43, of Ceres.

Madeleine Albright, it seems, "will also share her recommendations for the next president."

There will be more than one recommendation? Oh joy.

Part of her tour to promote her new literary effort, Memo to the President Elect: How We Can Restore America's Reputation and Leadership, the former United States Secretary of State will stop by Nob Hill to chat with the peons. President and chief executive officer of the World Affairs Council of Northern California, Jane Wales, will also speak.

The political fierceness happens tonight at 6:30 p.m. at the Fairmont Hotel. The public, shockingly enough, is welcome to come, but seating is limited. Expect local political fetishists, hanger-ons, local media, and chin-scratchers galore.

First Oprah, now Craig. Who's next?

We instantly checked to see who was "headlining" the event and the six biggest names are: Jack Johnson, the Verve, Raconteurs, Portishead, Kraftwerk, Death Cab for Cutie, Roger Waters, Love and Rockets and My Morning Jacket. It doesn't seem as strong of a line-up compared to last year's line-up: Arcade Fire, Andrew Bird, The Decemberists, Amy Winehouse and of course, Bjork. (And we only named a few.) Is it as exciting? We're thinking, no. But, we were excited to see two local bands come up on the list: Rogue Wave and dredg.

Rogue Wave, an indie-rock band from Oakland, are performing on the first day of the festival, Friday, April 25th. They recently released their third album, "Asleep at Heaven's Gate" on Brushfire Records. (Their first two records were released on Subpop Records.) Zack Rogue, the lead singer and founder of the band, has been featured at Noise Pop 2006 where SFist Emily thought the male-pattern baldness seemed to plague half of the band members. (That sucks.) This doesn't deter these guys from rocking out.

Dredg (officially named "dredg" with a lower-case d) are originally from Los Gatos and have been together since 1996. They officially just came out of hibernation last fall with a performance at Great American Music Hall. (Did anyone go?) It looks like they will have some new music for Coachella.

To see the full list of performers, take the jump.

Timberwolves 109 Warriors 108- And how did the Warriors celebrate not only MLK Day but the official start of George Bush's last year in office? They lost to the worst team in the NBA, the Minnesota Timberwolves as an Al Harrington lay up in the final seconds clanged off the rim. The TWolves had lost 16 straight games on the road. Of interest is the fact that the Beard had only fifteen points and missed a couple of shots at the end of the game, this coming after spending the previous night partying in Sundance as the movie he produced, "Made in America," premiered. That might have had an effect on his performance, but we're going to let it slide as how many basketball teams feature a player who produces a documentary that makes it to Sundance?

-A few notes about Sunday's playoff games: We here at SFist have a rule about playoff games played in freezing temperatures in that whichever coach appears to be less spooked by the cold wins. Coughlin dressed like it was just a normal winter game and other than looking like he got frostbite, didn't appear to be bothered at all. Mike McCarthy, the Packers coach, dressed like Ralphie's brother in A Christmas Story. We also couldn't help notice that while Eli looked completely nonplussed by the weather, Favre looked miserable out there.